Are You Emotionally Intelligent Or Emotionally Inept? Your Employees Can Tell You
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And are you courageous enough to find out?
Intelligence: The capacity to acquire and apply knowledge and the ability to use the faculties of thought and reason.
Inept: Displaying a lack of judgment, sense, or reason or foolish.
Best way to find out your level of emotional intelligence (EQ)?
Hand this article to 5-6 people who know you well and who will be honest with you. Ask them to be brutally honest with you about their thoughts about your EQ.
You will get an indication of your levels by how you react or respond to what you have asked them to do.
If you get defensive, your EQ has gone south. If you can breathe and be curious and excited about learning more, your emotional intelligence tank is full.
Note: To person I am asking for input on what you think of me.
Please go through the statements below and rate your assessment of my emotional intelligence. Please consider how I respond generally, and in stressful situations.
I would really appreciate your candid, brutally honest input.
I am trying to improve how I deal with people both personally and professionally so I can have better relationships.
Thanking you in advance.
How I think _________ (Name) is doing in the area of emotional intelligence?
Score this person on a scale of
1 (Never does this) 2. 3. 4.(Sometimes does this) 5. 6. 7. (Mostly does this)
1. Listens respectfully for understanding. S/he repeats back what other people say. Score. ____
2. Asks exploratory questions to understand those s/he communicates with. Score. ________
3. Thoughtfully considers others’ feelings when making decisions. Score. _______
4. Respectfully asks for input from others who may support or challenge her/his perspective. Score. ______
5. Often asks self what it might be like to be in someone else’s situation. Score. _____
6. S/he regulates her/his emotions as is appropriate to the situation. Score. ______
7. Works and plays well with others. Score. ________
8. Is honest with her/himself about strengths and limitations. Score. _______
9. Is aware enough about limitations or mistakes to get help when s/he needs it. Score. _______
10. Makes efforts to be comfortable with others. Score. _____
11. Helps others to be comfortable in social situations. Score. ________
12. Is a model for remaining calm and engaged during conflicts and uncertainties. Score. ___________.
Finally. The one thing that I think ___________(name) could do to increase her/his emotional intelligence is ________________________________________________.
This glimpse into others’ views on your emotional intelligence may offer you an opportunity to improve your relationships, or it may validate what you already know.
There is a lot written about emotional intelligence and its impact on one’s success — both personally and professionally.
The business case for the advantages of building one’s emotional intelligence is well documented.
If you look at prominent business people and politicians who have stumbled or fallen flat on their face in their careers, it is crystal clear that their low level of emotionally intelligence did them in. They are all people who have demonstrated a high level of talent and IQ.
Without a developed level of emotional intelligence, we run a high risk of failure, regardless of our unique talents or intellectual prowess.
In the presence of emotionally intelligent leaders, there is a higher retention of top talent as well as an increase in employee satisfaction and drive.
Daniel Goleman sites Hay/McBer’s research in his book Working with Emotional Intelligence.
“Based on their research with hundreds of top executives at 15 global companies, the results were stunning. Only one cognitive ability set star performers above average performers — strategic thinking. Except for this one exception, intellectual or technical superiority played no role in leadership success.
Rather, emotional competence made the crucial difference between mediocre leaders and the best of breed.”
How are you doing?
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