Blunder After Blunder
"George, have you thought of seeing a psychiatrist?"
"Are you out of your mind, First Lady? As a War President I have a commitment to the American people to protect them and protect us our sacred democracy, freedom and liberty. chaser from Illinois, before he became president.
"Please stop it George. US foreign policy could not possibly get worse; your administration continues to make it worse by the hour. Iraq is a quagmire, as Cheney says. The Taliban is still doing fine in Afghanistan, than you; and Osama bin Laden is still at large. North Korea is now a nuclear-weapons state and Iran's nuclear ambitions are closer to reality by the hour. Palestinian territories and Lebanon. All these blunders can be traced to you, Supreme Commander. Have you no decency, Sir? "
The President smiled hoping that his charm would calm the First Lady and at the same time offered to her a piece of toast he had just buttered and covered with that great Marmalade from Seville oranges. But she did not fall for the charm offensive and remained silent. He finally spoke:
"You are being too harsh on me and my administration. Our disastrous record is not just a run of bad luck but a simple misinterpretation of existing policies; I can not expect my Cabinet Members and other officers to hit homeruns every time at bat. did I go wrong? "
"You will not admit this George but it is the truth: Clinton left a world full of affection, if not undeclared love, for our country. effort to get some of their players a spot in the American NBA. Our relations with the rest of the world were excellent and even the 'nasties' were happy to break bread with Clinton's envoys. "
"Forget about Clinton, First Lady. He is a past president and therefore just a paragraph in Wikipedia, while I am still here at the helm of the ship of state with my gaze fixed on the faraway horizon and the bright future that awaits our nation ! "
"Gaorge, you have been reading Melville again! It really does not help your mental state and may worsen your Smeniakowsky-Berehnson Syndrome and the fearful nitrohemosyndialisis of your blood. by disagreement mistrust your policies and the country as a whole.
Again, the President smiled but this time it was a smile touched by a sardonic gesture. He replied:
"Laura, I think I have had enough of your insolent words. Long time ago I asked you, and others if you were with me or against me.
"George, it is not a matter of being with or against you." It is a matter of true love for this country; Borders. Try for once to admit that you are wrong and backpedal a little, before it is too late! "
She paused to fix herself a toast with the great Marmalade and then said:
"Your insistence on our supremacy has made it harder to win international support." Instead of developing important relationships through wise diplomatic offsets, you emphasized a US willingness to play the Lone Ranger. response to specific US policies. Yet you and your advisors never considered following a different set of policies that would reduce opposition and improve US security "
"Lady, who do you think you are? All of a sudden you have become a political pundit and probably a liberal adherent of anything anti Bush! I am going to talk to my mother about it!"
"George, please, not that! I am just trying to keep you from making matters worse. There is still time to rectify. You have underestimated our opponents, convinced that they were too weak to defy the world's only superpower. The sad part is that the past five years have shown that even insignificant nations have endless means to counter US power. "
The President became serious and asked the First Lady:
"What did you say about Clinton?"
"I said that he made no enemies for our country." Then he became an ex-President and made a fortune with a couple of book, public appearances, seminars, golf tournaments and Miss Universe pageants, I think "
"Do you think I could get some of the things Clinton got?
"An impeachment if you keep screwing up, dear!"